"Money, Money, Money!"

Money, money, money! Dollar Almighty!
Early in the morning we’ll rise to worship Thee;
Money, money, money! Mammon is our king!
Root of all evil, is our love for Thee.

Money, money, money! ‘Mericans adore Thee,
Spending all our savings earned and only bills paying;
Credit cards and financing, interest compounding,
Which did, and is, will evermore unfree.

Money, money, money! Though our kids are blessings,
Though they will inherit ours, their futures may not be;
Fleeting Thou art, money, there is none for giving—
You sprouted wings and too soon flew: cha-ching!

Money, money, money! Dollar Almighty!
Sinful beings all strive for Thee in morn, and noon, and eve;
Money, money, money! Dollar Almighty!
"god" in whom we trust, yet this oughtn’t be.

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adapted from "Holy, Holy, Holy! Lord God Almighty"
Lyrics: Reginald Heber, first published 1826
Tune: John Hopkins, 1850
Public Domain

"King Omybad"

I’m really quite disappointed
Not sure he was even anointed
What is it about this king
That makes everyone sing?

At quadrennial tournament,
He had an impressive tent,
But is he even of noble birth?
Where’s he from, where on Earth?

He cares not for our beloved colors
But marches under the stripes of others
Disregards the Founders Scroll
Though he taught it, I’ve been told

Everyone must go to the apothecary
Or be taxed for all they carry
He wants our swords and our bows
But what of the robbers on the road?

Black-robed puppets on the bench,
Acting on filth, passing out stench
Meanwhile the Guard is silent,
Seemingly ignorant, or maybe compliant

He’s bought all the towns’ criers
They’ve turned their coats, all are liars,
Pushing agendas of their own
Instead of investigating the throne

Royal excursions on the peasants’ dime?
He really has gone too far this time:
Must be reminded whose money he’s spent
When he’s acted without Council consent

Caught red-handed, with enemies consort
Traded five for one of this sort?
Picks blackberries before standing with his men
Where’s the example, who let this man in?

Each mistake piles up and compounds
He has greatly overstepped his bounds
And quite nearly snapped his leash
That’s it! It’s time: give him peach!